A Family Broken

We used to look like from the outside, a close family but at the beginning there was a small tare. As we, the children got older the tare became bigger and bigger and now we’re completely broken.

Yesterday my fiance and I experienced my sister being kicked out of my parent’s house again and practically being disowned. It was one of the hardest things I have ever had to witness. I understand my parents concerns but I do understand how my sister is feeling because I went through the same thing. I just hid it better…

Growing up we were always taught to not to trust people, to ALWAYS listen to parents and be perfect. The problem was the lessons never really helped me through live. Not trusting people just doesn’t work because you need friends and other people in your life you can turn to and they can’t always be your parents. We were taught to OBEY us otherwise we would be reminded of it for the rest of our lives and get yelled at over and over again. Being their ideal, their idea of a perfect daughter could never happen because we’re human and whatever we did or tried our best at was never good enough.

It seems that parents that have two children that are some year apart don’t realize they can’t compare them. Just because at such and such a time this kid was doing these things, doesn’t mean the other will do the same. I think to worst thing to do just that because they are completely TWO different people and everyone goes through a different path to find they’re way through life.

It’s funny how the only way I became aware of the way my family and I communicates with each other is when my fiance witness me talking to my sister about something. He said, “Do you notice you don’t actually talk to your sister? You attack her and then she attacks you?” I took a step back and realized. Yes, I do and that could explain why our family fights all the time, why every time someone says something our defences go up. I told myself that I can’t do this anymore and will do my best to stop it.

My fiance and I have been together now for 10 year, planning a wedding and have been through a lot together due to my parents disapproval of my relationship with him. Only 7 years in to the relationship they realized he’s here to stay. Yesterday, he witness how my family truly communicates and he even made him tear up.

The hardest thing about witnessing this whole ordeal was the aftermath! My father yelling at my sister to GET out and saying GOODBYE! With my sister streaming, carrying her bags of clothing out the door and saying “I don’t need this anymore!” When my fiance, my sister and I got in the car, my sister was streaming crying “I don’t want to live! Just let me die! I can’t take this anymore!” And the worst part was her crying for our mother like she did when she did when she was a little girl. It broke my heart.

Now, she’s living with us because who else does she have and she needs a stable and safe environment. I hope I can provide the shoulder, the love, financial and EMOTIONAL support she needs. I hate to see the family broken like this in 10 years but right now, the future doesn’t look so bright that includes all of this family.